Embracing Authenticity: Cultivating Healthier Relationships Through Personal Responsibility

In today’s episode, we tackle a compelling question: "Why Do You Think You Know What Is Best for Others?" This question challenges us to examine the assumptions and biases we carry into our interactions, especially in contexts where guidance or advice is involved. It’s a critical inquiry for anyone involved in mentoring, coaching, or any form of support role.

We'll explore the psychology behind our need to offer solutions and how this can sometimes overshadow truly listening and understanding the unique needs and journeys of individuals. It's crucial to recognize that each person’s path to healing and growth is deeply personal. Instead of imposing our perspectives, embracing a posture of humility and openness can lead to more meaningful support and empowerment.

This discussion will provide professionals and caregivers with strategies to foster environments where autonomy and self-discovery are prioritized. We’ll discuss the importance of asking questions, encouraging self-reflection, and allowing others to define their own goals and what wellness means to them.

Join us as we dive deep into understanding the delicate balance of offering support without overshadowing the personal agency and insights of those we aim to help. This conversation is about enhancing our effectiveness as supporters by fostering an atmosphere of respect, understanding, and true empowerment.

Welcome to "The Heart of Success," where we redefine success with Larisa Vakulina – a multi-awarded entrepreneur, healer, and mentor.

Feeling unfulfilled despite your achievements? Larisa knows your journey. Each week, she shares powerful insights to help you blend professional success with personal fulfillment. Through her unique blend of business strategies and spiritual principles, you'll discover your true self and build a heart-aligned life.

Ready to transform your life?

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For more tips and resources, join my newsletter at LarisaVakulina.com. Stay connected, stay inspired, and remember, your success starts from the heart. Until next time, keep thriving and shining!

Chapters

• 0:00 Personal Responsibility in Relationships
• 12:53 Ascara Principles Signature Program

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:32

Happy Wednesday. You are on the Heart of Success show and I'm your host, larissa Vakulina. Go live every Wednesday at 2 pm South Australian time zone and here on this show I'm sharing with you a little tips, tools, happiness, easy Flowing and Effortless Give and Receive concept. You probably know what it is. Today I wanted to talk about why is it that most of us assume that we know what is best for others? This is a very, very interesting question because it is almost like in our unconscious level the concept sits so deep and it is also almost like in our bloodstream. I know what you need to do. I know how to fix that for you. I know how to deal with this issue in your life. I know how to help you to do this that way. So, yeah, we kind of believe that we're coming from that very intentional place of really genuinely helping others, but a lot of time we kind of always forcing and putting our opinion or our way of how we did things on others and we need to realize that we are all unique expression of this divine plan. We are all unique and only one.

Speaker 1: 2:44

All 8 billion people on this planet have its own uniqueness and have its own way of understanding how to live their life. Yes, a lot of people are lost, confused, they suffer, they live in conflict. But, again, there is no one way for all people to resolve this. And the only way to resolve it to actually connect to that internal place of wisdom within yourself. Only that place within yourself can help you to make decision in that particular way that only you can make that decision. Yes, we can inspire, we can motivate, we can share our own journeys, our own ways of how we overcome some conflicts and problems and health issues and relationship conflicts and crises of all types, but it is going to be only my way. So what I am actually sharing with my students and with my clients is that they need to find their own way. We cannot follow anyone's system, methods, all these tools and creation that many people are doing. We need to start to understand that we are all very, very unique and if we are forcing others to do the way we did it, we already are breaking the principle which is one of the principles of my ASCARA program.

Speaker 1: 4:43

Ascara principles, ascara method program, six weeks program. One of these principles is that we need to start to really develop a hygienic way in our relationship. What do I mean by this? It's like I only can take responsibility for me, for my thinking, feeling, doing, creating, making decisions and not making decisions for everything in my life. So when you find that individuation point of what you want your life look like, if you're willing to take responsibility for everything that I named and become super honest with yourself, well then you make the first step into make your relational living, because we all are relational in this creation. We relate it to ourselves, we relate to others, we relate to the environment and the grander creation.

Speaker 1: 5:57

So the relational principle needs to be having an absolute purity of what you want in your life, how you want your life to live and how you know exactly how you wanted it. It's only you know that no one knows how you want your life to be, because you are the unique expression of this divine plan, and what needs to happen is that we need to stop assuming that we know better what is the best for other and others. We only need to support them to connect to themselves. That's where we can actually display our own journey to ourselves, share the turns and all these diversions that we did on the way to connect to ourselves so that they can find the strengths within themselves, because if I could do it, anyone could. You could do it as well. So, to have that journey towards yourself and then, once you have your own individuation point, you know what you want in your life and you know exactly how you would like to express yourself and take responsibility for everything that you're doing, thinking, feeling well, then your life will start to show exactly that responsibility. You will start to meet people that are responsible. You will start to meet people who are knowing what they want, who are having their individuation point very, very strong, who are creating freely and who have this purity in the relationship because they're not breaking the principle of hygienic relationship. So I'm inviting you to contemplate on this, because what I am observing time and time again, where we are kind of, we're moving from the really rigid way of doing business, we're moving from the very rigid way of the society taught us how we can do things, but we're still going into this another extreme. We're still looking for someone who can to heal, what to use, what to do and how to implement their way of healing.

Speaker 1: 9:06

I did heal myself from cancer naturally, organically, without any surgery or any medical protocols, but I'm not saying to people that I teach do like I did and you're going to be healing yourself. It's not what I am teaching. What I'm teaching is connect to yourself. Only you know your way. Only you know how you're going to heal yourself and treat yourself. I only can show you the way, that you are the one that have all the wisdom and all the answers on all of your questions within.

Speaker 1: 10:02

So please, start to see your life and your journey as an adventure, to connect to yourself, the purity, the hygienic, relational space where you're not going to force others to do what you think best for them. You're not going to demand others to do and be the way that you think would be good for them. So you would live your own personal life, the way you know how and the way. Only you know what you want in your life, and then you will free other people for them to live their own life. But by only living your life you can inspire the other. But by only living your life you can inspire the other. By only helping yourself to take responsibility for everything in your life, you can actually demonstrate and support the others to do the same. So please, just maybe contemplate on this and let's talk about it. Just maybe contemplate on this and let's talk about it. Please connect to my YouTube channel and also to other social media handles, because I'm everywhere there.

Speaker 1: 11:23

I'm talking little snippets about how we can start to build our own personal lives the way we want, without offending others, without forcing others to give us what we think they have to give us. No one ever has to give us anything or be anything that we want them to be. So this is the number one principle of creating pure, hygienic, relational space where you know exactly what you want and you leave others to know what they want, absolutely honest with the state that you are in, and you're honest that maybe you didn't reach that state yet and you are somewhere struggling and maybe you're going two steps back into wanting other people to be somehow different for you. Well then, be self-honest and be honest to forgive yourself and accept yourself at the point where you are. What is important is that you have your intention to grow. You have this intentional desire.

Speaker 1: 12:53

I want to sort it all out for me. I'm not going to sort it out for other people. I'm going to sort it out first for me, and that's what my Ascara Principles Signature Program is based on. It is based on how I went through my own fears, doubts, demands, all the forceful power to make other people different and force them to do, realized that everything is within us. Now I know exactly how my life needs to look like and because I hold that positive outlook of only me is responsible for what I'm creating. It gives me a chance to project that responsibility onto others, that positivity, that really healthy outcome, because I hold it within myself and that's why I always have external world around me projecting exactly the same how I feel.

Speaker 1: 14:14

So, thank you so much. I'll see you next Wednesday and if you're really interested, please reach out and I can explain a little bit more about the Ascara Principles Program and possibly you would be interested to start to shift your life from this thought process that I know better what is best for the other and I'm living my life to helping others. But if you're helping from that space of follow my um, follow what I went through, it's not really serving you or other. Well, show it, display how you are living your life and by doing doing this you're already healing, supporting and lifting people out of their doubts and things. So help them to connect to themselves. Thank you so much.